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Antigone's journey into the world of romance is hi-jacked by Rudyard, who needs her to seduce a rich and valuable client. Written by T. A. Woodsmith
- Directors - Andy Goddard and John Wakefield
- Music - James Whittle and the Piffling Philharmonic
- Script Editor - David K. Barnes
- Rudyard Funn - Felix Trench
- Antigone Funn - Beth Eyre
- Eric Chapman - Tom Crowley
- Georgie Crusoe - Ciara Baxendale
- Madeleine - Belinda Lang
- Mayor Desmond Desmond - Steve Hodson
- Seymour Prophitte - Max Olesker
- Waitress - Holly Campbell
- Chairman - Pip Gladwin
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