Search

Home > Real Talk Recovery > #206: How Can My Relationship Heal When My Partner Is Not Attracted To Me?
Podcast: Real Talk Recovery
Episode:

#206: How Can My Relationship Heal When My Partner Is Not Attracted To Me?

Category: Health
Duration: 00:51:35
Publish Date: 2023-02-06 12:00:00
Description:

Caller Ashley's Question: "How can you approach recovery/continued commitment or deal with your addict's extramarital attraction in a scenario where they don't have those sexual feelings/attraction to you? I got married not knowing about my spouse's physical sexual preferences... he was not open about his preferences/attraction which is mainly towards people/types that are very different from me. The assumptions I made that I was his "type" (assumptions he fostered dishonestly) were blown apart by what I found on our D-Day and I struggle to want to continue in a relationship where the physical attraction is one-sided and I feel like a clown trying to be intimate. It's very hard to do the "thank you for staying present with me" when I know I can never offer even a sliver to him of what the other noticeable woman could. I know he loves me. We were best friends. I think he just wanted someone who was very into him and who wanted similar life goals, but the physical attraction was/is a really important aspect to me. My first marriage fell apart from my ex's porn use and infidelity after my body changed from two pregnancies and treatment for breast cancer in my 20s. I just... I struggle to even want to wake up in the morning knowing that this is supposed to be my next fifty years and that I'll never have a relationship with someone who really wanted me. What trust is there to build? The trust that he'll focus his sexual energy on me? I don't want focus from someone who isn't attracted to me. That feels humiliating. Horrifying."


// SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION //

We would love to answer any questions you have about addiction, trauma, recovery, healing, and anything you can think of. Click the link below to submit your question (and if you're open to being a guest on the podcast, you can schedule your call time as well)! We're also curious to know if there are any topics you'd like to hear us discuss on the podcast.

https://www.therapybros.com/call-in-and-ask-a-question/

Send mail to: Therapy Brothers, 40 W Cache Valley Blvd Ste 3c, Logan, UT 84341


// Tyler Patrick LMFT | "The Wandering Therapist" //

15-Minute Free Consultation Call: https://lovestrong.com/consultation-call

Therapy Practice: https://lovestrong.com

Instagram: https://instagram.com/the.wandering.therapist

Facebook: https://facebook.com/love.strong.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXaR4084r-Z_251xVdoyMFQ


// Brannon Patrick LCSW | "The Expert" //

Website: https://www.brannonpatrick.com

Therapy Practice: https://therapyutah.org/

Instagram: https://instagram.com/brannon_patrick

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ExpertBrannon

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/bpatricklcsw


// SUPPORT OUR CHANNEL //

Newsletter: https://www.therapybros.com/subscribe

Donations: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=XQUZPJ6QNC22C

Theme Music By: Max Wardle Music

Books & Audiobooks We Recommend (We earn a small percentage from your purchase with any of the books links on this page): https://lovestrong.com/most-impactful-books/


// OUR COURSES //

Boundary Bootcamp: https://www.brannonpatrick.com/Boundarybootcamp

Pornography Addiction Recovery Kickstart: https://lovestrong.com/courses/overcome-pornography-addiction/


// OUR EVENTS //

Radiant Dawn | Women's Retreat: https://radiantdawnconference.com/

Rising Son | Men's Retreat: https://risingson.org

Vibrant Love | Couple's Retreat: https://vibrantlove.org

Total Play: 0