British author Stephanie Theobald brings her ‘Sex Drive Salon’ to Desert General this Saturday

British author, journalist, and broadcaster Stephanie Theobald will be in conversation with author Rachel Resnick about Theobald’s road-trip memoir Sex Drive this Saturday (April 11) at Desert General in Twentynine Palms at 3:00 p.m. Reporter Gabriel Hart spoke to Theobald about her memoir and the event that’s being called her “Sex Drive Salon.”

Known for her playful and thoughtful work around sexuality and alternative feminism, Stephanie Theobald’s Sex Drive documents her road trip of self-discovery across America where she acquired revelations of self-pleasure as an alternative way to heal. 

“Basically solo sex is one way of saying it, but that’s what the book is about. It was my drive across America having met all these incredible you know sex positive feminists, specifically one called Betty Dodson who was eighty-seven when I met her in 2014. She had just restarted solo sex workshops where women would gather in her rent-controlled apartment in New York. It was an incredible experience. Her line in the 70s was ‘there was no information for women’ and now there is misinformation because of the Internet. You know there’s all this craziness out there, so there’s got to be a voice of sanity. You know that line ‘when you’re ready for the lesson you meet your teacher… Because the idea is, if you are not ashamed about your body, you learn about your body, and you learn about the pleasure that your body can give, you then you go out into the world and you light other women up, you tell them about it and you say ‘be positive and get into your body and learn how it works.’” 

In Sex Drive, Theobald goes beyond her personal awakenings with solo-sex and into hard science, comparing the proverbial “horsepower” of male and female nerve endings that some men might find humbling.

“My line in the book is that since we have 8000 nerve endings in the female clitoris and men have about 400, so it’s like we have Lamborghinis or Mustangs and they have bicycles.” 

I asked Theobald to elaborate on solo sex in context of our increasingly fragmented society where many have become isolated from each other, and why solo sex in lieu of focusing on a partner to connect with.

“It’s a good question and the simple answer is that… and I’m talking about women here because I am a woman… I would say that masturbation is the foundation of our sexuality. If you don’t know how to give yourself pleasure, then you can’t expect your partner to. So when you light yourself up and you learn about the body in a shame-free way, then like wow, abracadabra man! You’ll go out there and you’re gonna light the world up! Then you will find the most amazing partner and you will not expect your partner to please you. You know who you are and you will go into that relationship as this glowing, vibrant, curious person and I think that’s very important.” 

For the past six years, Theobald has been living in the California high desert—three of them spent in a cave at Boulder Gardens Sanctuary in Pioneertown. She is currently working on a new non-fiction novel inspired by this experience. For Saturday’s event, Theobald will explore the power of confession on the page, the last remaining taboos around female desire and the importance of women speaking openly—and truthfully—about pleasure. Expect a lively, intimate exchange blending literature, personal experience, and a touch of irreverence—including a round of “solo-sex bingo” where participants can contribute anonymous fantasies into the pot.The Sex Drive Salon starts at 3:00 p.m. this Saturday at Desert General, located at Kitchen in the Desert at6427 Mesquite Avenue Twentynine Palms.

The event is free and open to the mature public.

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