Episode 53 - Loving the F with Kelley Wolf - Forbidden FLOW

Kelley Wolf

The Power of Now

• It's the illusion that you have control over the external. It’s the illusion that the history or the future is somehow impacting anything you have control over – you don’t.
• If someone asked me the top three things that have changed my life or that I believe are present in the work – its meditation, prayer and setting intentions…People say that’s being repeated everywhere and I think, “Amen, amen, amen.”
• I call it the roast chicken phenomenon. Put lemon, thyme, salt and pepper on the inside – cover the outside with butter and cook it at 425 degrees for about an hour and 15 minutes – its going to give you the perfect roast chicken…it’s the foundation of all the great chefs. Meditation, prayer and intention setting – that’s your roast chicken, don’t mess with it.
• The more of us coming to the table, to tell our stories, is the universe I want to live in. That’s the utopian complex at work – if it could even be possible, and I believe it is – that’s what it’s going to take to get there.
• If you tap into the present moment – your suffering ends. Its only when we story-play in the past or the present, the story starts to percolate.
• We’re so attached to our suffering and our story that we have a lot of resistance to wanting that to be, it almost seems to simple.
• Could you trust that magic that came from a devastating moment or event is now embedded fully in who you are in this moment? So it doesn’t even need to be said. Historical relevance lives within us, of course. But it doesn’t have to be brought into how you’re going to decide to do everything, every day.
• If you stay on the rumble strip, you bounce around, might pop a tire or get back on course. I believe deeply we can hit a rumble strip and get right back on to our flow – finding love over worry.
• Life is this beautiful dynamic thing – I like the “stuff.” I want to have the challenges, I want the moments that remind me who I am and what I’m made of. The whole thing isn’t supposed to be easy breezy, lemon squeezy the whole time. But when I hit the rumble strip, I also don’t want to stay there for an inordinate amount of time, its not healthy for me or anyone else. So hopefully what I do is take all things I’ve learned and practices I have to pop off that rumble strip to get back into flow again. And it really is finding love over worry – the rumble strip is the worry and the road is the love.
• Suffering happens in a moment. The thoughts and the conversations are what continue it.
• I used to call it “role calling.” Like if I was having a moment I was calling all kinds of people and then I’m doing one of two things. I’m either spewing what’s going on with me or begging for insight. But stillness, most of the time, holds some kind of awareness or feelings. Sometimes it just a wave of feelings where that deep crying comes in. And if you could cry everyday – it would be amazing – healing.
• The most powerful, sexiest, smart, lovable men that I’ve met are the ones who have done the work. Who have done the spiritual work. There’s nothing more delicious in any human at all, than tapping into that place where there can be vulnerability but there can also be masculinity and being an alpha…There is nothing more attractive or enticing and men need to hear that too.
• I’m not a goal-based coach – the goal is now.
• Elkhart Tolle is often asked, “If I agree or live in the life of the power of now, then what happens to my ambition? What happens to my hopes, dreams, etc?” Yet – when committed to that practice, things continue to happen. Life continues to move forward but it doesn’t have a vice grip on it. And I think pat of being in the vertical, being in the now, is that you are more entrenched into your calling as to who you really are because it isn’t this exterior force, it isn’t some place to be, it isn’t some destination to get to.
• When I’m in the present, I can define clearly, so much better what I want.
• When you commit to the practice – stuff happens.
• I do believe we’re at a crossroads. I do believe we are evolving as a species and that what that evolution looks like is a more spiritually aligned being that lives more in the present moment.
• One thing I am committed to and I hope people take in – breathe. When it feels overwhelming when those four or five big life events feel like they’re happening all at once – they’re not though it feels that way – and if we take those grounding breaths just say, “Help me with my next step - what is my next step because that’s all I can do right then.”